Tough decisions: when to end a marriage

Resource to help you decide when to stay or go

Updated: Tuesday, 12 Jun 2012, 9:44 AM EDT
Published : Tuesday, 12 Jun 2012, 9:44 AM EDT

Grand Rapids, Mich. (WOTV) - Are you undecided about whether you should end your destructive marriage or stay and work it out?  Lundy Bancroft, the same author who wrote, "Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men " has joined forces with Jac Patrissi and published, "Should I Stay Or Should I Go?: A Guide to Knowing If  Your Relationship Can - And Should - Be Saved" .  The authors guide you through an evaluation process that helps you put things in proper perspective that assists you in making a decision. Some of the initial questions the book asks you to consider include:

 

-Do you feel repeatedly like your partner keeps you at a distance or makes you a low priority?

-Do you feel he's more attached to his buddies or partying than being with you?

-Do you find yourself wondering if he really loves you?

-Does his anger sometimes make you nervous?

Lundy Bancroft has spent the last fifteen years of his career specializing in domestic abuse and abusive men. This time, he has joined forces with Jac Patrissi, who is a wealth of information and support to women who cannot make a decision to leave a destructive, or perhaps, abusive relationship. Deciding to leave is not the same as knowing a relationship is over.  In this book, they lead the reader through exercises enabling her to see possibilities for the future and will help guide you to finding answers to tough issues:

-Tell the difference between a healthy-yet-difficult relationship and one that is really not working


-Recognize the signs that their partner has a serious problem


-Stop waiting to see what happens-and make their own growth the top priority


-Prepare for life without their partner-even as they keep trying to make the relationship work

Obviously, no book will make this enormous decision for you, but I highly recommend it as a great guide along the way. 

Disclaimer: nothing herein constitutes legal advice.

  • Gail Saukas
Name:
Gail Saukas

Background:
DAWN Practice Manager

Website:
DAWNforwomen.com

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About the Author:
Gail Saukas is the DAWN Manager and WOTV 4 Women category specialist focusing on women’s legal issues. West Michigan based law firm DAWN, Divorce Attorneys for Women, is a family operation and Gail is involved in all aspects of the business.
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