Expert recommended read for a healthy marriage. Photo credit: bookmoving.com
Updated: Thursday, 21 Feb 2013, 3:01 PM EST
Published : Friday, 22 Feb 2013, 4:37 AM EST
GRAND RAPIDS, Mich. (WOTV) - Have you heard of or read ' The 5 Love Languages, The Secret to Love That Lasts', by Gary Chapman ? Quite a lot of people have, since it has been on the New York Times bestseller list 283 times, but if you haven't yet, read it now. It is one of the best books on communicating love to your spouse and may just help keep you out of divorce court.
The premise behind Mr. Chapman's book is that we all have a primary love language, or way that we express love to our spouse. If our spouse does not speak the same love language he does not see our actions as love.
Example of Love Language Barrier
For instance, if you make a special dinner for your husband and have it ready when he comes home from work and he acts like it is no big deal it is likely because he does not speak your emotional love language (acts of service). You become upset because you have put forth an effort to tell him how much you care by providing a great dinner and he has blown it off.
You feel like he takes you for granted and ignores all the things you do for him. He, on the other hand, may be dying for you to tell him what a great provider he is (affirmation) and does not read your special dinner as a message of love. He thinks you don't care because you have not told him so in his emotional love language, which is affirmation.
Tools you can use
Mr. Chapman came to his theory through evaluating his notes taken during marital counseling sessions. He found that couples were all complaining about the same things and through this observation he broke it down into how each of us expresses love. According to Chapman, "Learning to speak the primary love language of your spouse may radically effect his or her behavior." Since some of the reasons marriages fail is a lack of communication and feeling unloved and unappreciated by a spouse, having the tools this book teaches may just help you keep your marriage on track.
More about DAWN- Attorney's for Women
At DAWN (Divorce Attorneys for Women), headquartered in Grand Rapids, Michigan , we help women to resolve their situation while protecting your legal rights as a woman, mother, human being, and partner in marriage. We have defended the legal rights of women for over 30 years, empowering them to realize that life can be different. For compassionate, experienced legal representation, contact a divorce attorney for women at DAWN to take the first step toward a new and happier life .
Nothing herein constitutes a legal opinion.
Copyright The 5 Love Languages, by Gary Chapman,1992, 19945, 2004, 2010, Northfield Publications
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